Looking To The Future

Following my post a few days ago about my friend and her body modifications, my mom (who reads my blog) asked me 'Well Lily, that's all well and good but what about your son? What will you do if he wants to do that to his body?' I would like to think that I don't mind, but yet when she said it there was a small knot in my stomach. Part of me would never want him to do anything to his perfect little body. Does that make me a hypocrite? I don't think so. I think my initial feeling comes from the fact that right now he is not even a year old! How can I even contemplate him having a tattoo or piercing his eyebrow!

I do like to think that when he gets to the age of 18 that I won't be too bothered. So long as he thinks about it long and hard before taking the plunge and he is doing it for all the right reasons, I don't think I will have too much of a problem with him indulging in a bit of body modification! Who knows how far it will have progressed by then. When he turns 18 it will be 2030! That's pretty darn amazing! When I was born in the early nineteen eighties I never really imagined that by the time I was middle aged I'd be well into the 21^st century! It's not something I could have wrapped my head around. I remember at school being asked to draw the house of 2000 and it was all automatic appliances and a parking spot for my rocket car! None of us could really grasp that it was only ten years away, there was just something magical about the year 2000!

Looking around, not that much has changed.. I want my rocket car dammit!

Anyhow, I'm getting way off track here. Once I had established that once my son is older and properly informed I would be cool with his desire to body mod, we got to talking about ear piercing. I had mine done at a year old. I'm pretty sure I didn't ask for it! Yet it's perfectly acceptable in society to pierce a baby's ears as young as a month old. I find it strange. I mean would you give your baby a navel ring? A tattoo? What is the difference.  Papa K writes a great article about this HERE

Trusting Your Parental Intuition

If you are a parent, then you will understand that paralyzing fear when you come to realize that your child depends on you completely for everything. You hold his or her life in your hands. I always assumed that this was a first time parent thing, but my friends who have more than one child all say it happens prior to the birth of every single child. One of my girlfriends in particular is a Mom of 5 and has another bundle of joy on the way and yet she says she still has cold sweats and is adamant that this one will be the one she won't know how to look after! One huge piece of advice I can give you as a parent is to relax! You've got this! No baby comes with an instruction manual, but you will get the hang of it!

Mommy, Daddy & Tyler

The great news is, that when it comes to parenting it is mostly intuitive. There is no special class or a specific book which can give you all of the answers! In fact, with modern technology we perhaps have access to too much information. There is such a huge amount of information out there, much of it conflicting, and it can be difficult to know what to put your faith in. So why not put your faith in yourself? Inside of every parent is a little voice that is telling you the right thing to do. That is the voice of your intuition. Learn to listen to that voice and you will soon find your own path. If you are having difficulty, then by all means consult books and websites, talk to other parents. But, instead of following their advice to the letter, just use it as inspiration. Listen to your intuition and decide what piece of advice fits for you and your child. We are all different. What works for baby A will not work for baby B. For example, often women feel lie they are under pressure to breastfeed their babies, but sometimes this is not what is right for you. I tried breastfeeding Tyler when he came along, but after a few weeks of bleeding nipples and the constant crying from Tyler because he wasn't getting enough milk I finally let go of the guilt and took the advice of the midwife to try bottle feeding. We are both much happier and my husband can help with the night feeds. I think even from the early days I knew it wasn't right for me and Tyler and I only wish I had listened to my intuition then instead of going through the pain and upset. That doesn't mean I won't try to breastfeed our next baby. I'd definitely give it a go in case it was just an incompatibility issue for Tyler and I.

I think that what I am trying to say here is that as you get to know your baby, you will get to know what he  or she needs. When you witness your child experiencing any strong emotion - be it fear, pain or even joy - it will trigger your on response. You will intuitively know how to sooth them and if you don't ... call your Mother!